Ah, Fall

That crisp sense of Autumn is in the air once more, alerting me to the annoying advances of Winter’s doom. How lovely.

No, I’m not a fan of the cold, thus obviously not a fan of Winter. As a vessel for Bipolar II disorder, the cold, bleak, and often dark and rainy Winter season here in Arkansas only prolongs my major depression cycles. I also happen to experience intense suicidal tendencies and abhorrent, worsening cases of self-loathing and blame during this lovely holiday season. Happy Hanukkah and Merry Christmas to me.

But I’m here to talk about the short period of Fall that we are hardly blessed with for long in Arkansas. I think it’s safe to say that at this point we are all delighting in pumpkin flavors, last-of-the-year hiking trips, plans for Halloween, and football season…

…Well, actually, football season is not the televised season in which I delight this season… Season season season.

As I don my signature homemade fandom sweatshirts, bulky and oversized, I make myself a cup of hot herbal tea and gather the makings to a healthy, hearty lunch. I then sit my ass down and turn on The Walking Dead. Fuck football. It’s The Walking Dead, bitches.

Indeed, if you ever see or hear me while I’m delved into this fabulous series every Fall, you would think I was watching my favorite team killing it in the playoffs. I scream and shout at the TV, I make bets with fellow TWD followers, I watch the post-show (The Talking Dead with Chris Hardwick), I throw Season Premiere/Finale parties, and I even develop my own fantasy zombie apocalypse team (as many football fanatics create fantasy football teams).

So for me, the highlight to the oncoming tragedy that is Winter is the fact that at least I get to watch Daryl and Michonne killing zombies like the sexy badasses they are. Mm. Talk about changing the colors in my leaves…

I apologize for that. I sincerely do.

Happy Fall everyone, or as I like to call it, “Transitional Season from Summer Fun to Cold as a Hobo’s Balls on the Streets of New York.” Cheers y’all.

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