Another Step Closer to the Closer

Guess what I did today?

I got myself some handmade, mineral eyeshadow that’s just absolutely beautiful. Plenty Mystic in Downtown Hot Springs, Arkansas has some incredible and rare makeups, including a rainbow of mineral eyeshadow, individually personalized foundations and powders (mixed together right there in front of you, personalized to your specific skin type and shade), and some fabulous Marilyn Monroe lipsticks plus Cleopatra eye liners.

I additionally bought a weekend’s supply of exquisite homemade salt-water taffy.


I bought my fiance’s wedding band! As soon as the lovely jeweler from Rings N Things hit her epiphany and placed that beauty into my palm, I knew it would be his. I pressed the ring between my hands and knew it was the one ring to rule them all. Well, at least it would be the one ring to rule Seb’s left hand.

My fiance then purchased what will soon become my wedding ring once I left the store. I don’t know a thing about what it looks like, nor does he know what his looks like. That’s the deal; we bought each other surprise wedding bands only to be revealed to each other on our wedding day.

When’s the big day, you may ask?

Not sure. After spending countless weeks and months trying to plan out our Wedding and the party, after nearly taking out a fairly hefty loan to cover the cost, we both happily decided to drop the intricate plans and expenses for only one day’s worth of exhaustion. Sure, that may be other folks’ kind of thing, but the usuals and the traditionals don’t really set well with us, and they never have.

Together, my fiance and I realized that the best, most joyful, and the most memorable portions of our relationship were all entirely spontaneous. We would head out for some cheap frozen yogurt (our go-to dessert date) and end up watching fireworks over the river from a neighboring bridge for free, not having any clue that fireworks would be scheduled. Or we would head out to pick up some quick groceries and end up walking along the dock, meeting interesting fishermen with a big, beautiful wolf dog.

However, any time we would try to plan something, we would always end up fighting, arguing, upset, or simply disappointed in the day. Planning hardly gets anyone anywhere besides “Below-Expectations-Ville,” but preparing and letting things unwind on their own take us straight to the town of “Surprised and Satisfied.”

Thus, nothing about our wedding will be perfectly planned. I told my fiance that I want him to say when and where and we’ll do it. I’m confident in our relationship, even during the low points. For me, I don’t particularly fixate on when we will be married, because I know in both of our hearts, souls, and minds we’ve already made that commitment. Now it’s just a matter of confirming it with others’ spiritualities and legally. Neither of us are going anywhere any time soon. Otherwise, we would have already taken off with the amount of terrible things we have both gone through and have both done to each other. It was simply a matter of getting over the stupid stuff, stop forcing things to happen, and simply prepare for more bouts of joy and horror in the future.

To us, all that planning, figuring out how to get both of our hectic families in the same room without there being a Bravo reality show in the making, and all that money spent on one big party with said Bravo-reality-TV families just seemed so wasteful. It especially seems wasteful when we could save that money for moving, for a house we would love, a care we would need, secondary educations which we may like to pursue… Not on a party meant to please everyone else. Again, some folks like it, they love it, and that’s what they will get. But my love and I just don’t land in that spectrum. He didn’t care for it all, and I quickly discovered that I didn’t either.

We’re excited for our spontaneous wedding and surprise wedding bands. We also have surprise wedding gifts for each other as well. It’s all gonna be one big surprise party, no matter who’s there.


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