Until today, I have never felt such intense pain from a full bladder before. We were on our way to Hot Springs to Hobby Lobby. Nearly there, I felt the first sensations of needing to pee. Yet, there had been a wreck inducing stand-still traffic. I was so worried whether or not the people were OK that I didn’t realize just how badly I needed to pee.
Dear sweet little baby jesus wrapped in ham. I had to pee so badly.
By the time we finally made it to Hobby Lobby, I was in intense pain and could barely move. I waddled on a rampage through the store, tunnel vision set on the restroom all the way in the back. I think I may have completely run over people and cut them off as they milled about, but I’m not entirely sure. I had such a strong need to piss that all sounds and sights were just dimmed out.
Once I got to the toilet, I let out a satisfactory 45 second pee. If you think that’s not long, time yourself when you pee next time, then you’ll understand. It was glorious.
So that concludes today’s adventure.
P.S. The wreck thankfully only uncluded a big, white pick-up truck that mashed up it’s front end. Only cop cars and tow trucks were around from what we could see, and it looked like the driver was OK. So as far as we know, no one else was detrimentally harmed.
P.P.S. I saw a tumblr post today basically stating that if you were put up for adoption as a baby instead of being aborted, then that’s a shitty and privelaged thing for people to expect of those who don’t wish to keep their children. The last response was someone agreeing and stating that if their mother didn’t want them then they didn’t want to bother being here….
So 1, why are you still here if that’s you’re hardcore belief,
and 2, are you honestly kidding me right now?
3, I shouldn’t have explain the issues with that any further. At all. Just. Jesus. I have so many not-so-nice things to say to these people right now, but for once in an incredibly great while I am going to show actual restraint and simply not say anything more.