Roses Have Thorns, but Thorns Don’t Always Have Roses

Poseurs: come in many shapes and sizes, as well as under the guise of various “committed” religions, creeds, and may be subscribing to generic cultural popularity. 

i.e. they will post public, “sincere” apologies to people they’ve royally treated like crap and entirely screwed over–but only take partial responsibility–instead of outright apologizing to those people personally and possibly getting that reciprocated.

Well, no, it would certainly be reciprocated. Because the people I know who were treated like wadded up McDonald’s burger wrappers have enough of a soul to accept true apologies and to be gracious about giving back as well.

But there you have it. The apology is just not real. The forgiveness is moot, because there’s nothing to forgive.

We were all used once more by this poseur; we were used as a publicity stunt, to promote her “genuine love” and “sincere heart.” No matter how you look at it, this simply proves that all that she did to us meant nothing to her and she’d do it again in a heartbeat. We are humans, but not to her.

And even after seeing and fully realizing all of this nasty work of a person, we still consider her a human being. Yes, we will explain why we do not wish to be around her anymore. We will say some pretty bitter things. Yet, nothing spoken outside of what happened on paper. We have not told anything against her that didn’t have witnesses who stated the same. But we know she’s a human being.

However, I believe that maybe once she did see us as living, emotional creatures. At some point she either fell back into an old pattern we knew nothing about, or she let herself become someone blind.

She may have a lot of problems to make her this way, either temporarily or something she will conflict with for the rest of her life. I hope and pray she will be alleviated. I pray that her inner turmoils, if present, will be relieved. I pray she will find true salvation, as I pray that we all will. Until then, there’s nothing else I can really do. There’s nothing much any of us can do.

I do believe that we made our own personal bad decisions, but these personal life choices had nothing to do with her. We did not start any fire-battle or war for what must be considered fun to her. Those decisions we made were little things that we will never attempt again, but taught each of us a lesson that made us stronger. Again, it had nothing to do with her, only that she may have witnessed a portion of our lives. The funny part to me, however, was that she had done the same things as well, had done them first, and on an objective scale much of it would be considered worse than what we did. Of course, on that point, I actually didn’t do anything. I was just standing by and letting it all happen, which is honestly just as bad.

On the debate portion, my portion, a little facebook brawl: a post debate that I specifically commented on stating something along the lines of “I wish to point out first and foremost that I’m having fun; I enjoy intellectual debates such as these.” All was deleted, she marched off in an angry huff for differences in our thoughts and ideals. She began leaving a flaming trail behind her. Word to the wise: to be affiliated with her in any way, you must believe in and agree with everything she believes in. Otherwise, she refuses to take any kind of opposition in as friendship, even if we all just mutually agree to disagree. No, she can’t even have that. If you are gay, sexually open to others, not an extreme feminist (or maybe there are just a few points you don’t completely agree with), a “Christian” (I say that in quotes because it’s loosely applied to her. I’m not sure what she is, because most of her actions and beliefs don’t point to any kind of Christian I’ve ever met, and there are many different kinds), or a plethora of others that even somewhat oppose with what she believes in, then you will be cut off as if you never existed. Even if you’re not jamming your beliefs down her throat, she fully believes that all she believes in is right without so much as a kindness extended to others at all.

It’s sad, but that’s not just my sight on it. Everyone else who was cut off in any way feel that way, and have stated much of what I have put into written-words right here. But it’s all fake. It’s all actions of the poseur.   

If she ever caught wind of this, she would either send me a little intellectual piece on how wrong I am. Or she might throw me a bone and claim I made a few points, but she will never tell me what they are and go right into righteously telling me how most of it is all my fault, as well as the others. Or she’ll continue to ignore it. Her blind eyes may never even catch the sight of me or the others in public again. But by the way she sheepishly kept her head down when crossing paths with others she had wronged, something tells me that a heart does stir within her… And it knows it has hurt other hearts. 

One thing is certain: it is pointless to attempt to reach out to her at this point in time. Until she sees us as something more than garbage (or at most, she colors us up like cement steps for her own personal gain and development), then our words will be wasted efforts. This is all on her to change, or to leave well enough alone.

This is her battle, not ours anymore. And for that, I’m grateful.

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